Fuck the Following :
Feburary 14th V-Day...
Fuck the 14th... Valentines Day doesn't start until the 15th in the ghetto... Thats when all the good shit is 50% off :)... and if bitches can wait out until Friday or the weekend its only gets better... because weekend>weekdays and the Valentine shit is practically free... from 75%-90% off... Whatchyall know about that...
“Your Battles”
I think its official that me and 99.9% of this community don’t give two shits about your battle… Calm the fuck down already… your battle will be voted on if you deserve it. No need to go campaigning for votes.
“I am not a Sneakerhead/shoehead/hypebeast”
Fuck you, you aren’t…? If you weren’t then you wouldn’t fucken be on a website which base name involves Sneakers… They don’t call it SneakerPlay because you like denim and gummy bears…
“I buy what I like”
Another lie in itself… I highly fucken doubt that you would be rocking Jordans if they were on your local Payless or Wal-Mart selves… It’s a fucken known fact actually that you wouldn’t be caught dead with a pair due to social acceptance… I am pretty sure Shaq has a pretty similar shoe to what Jordan has out for about 1/8 of the price and I don’t see anyone fucken rocking Shaqs… and when you do at those rare occasions its either because those are the real fucken people that “Buy what they like,” or they’re either too poor to drop a bill and some change on Jordans… (OoOoOoooohhhH what a shocker… not everyone in the world is as rich as your mom and dad…)
“BapeHeads”
To all the Nigodicklickers that drop 3 bills on a shoe that is clearly a variant of another… Funny how the majority of people who rock these real/fape never even heard of Bape before Lil’ Wayne… and to those who have heard of it before, funny how the majority of those people think its like a new brand of the Millennium... No sir again sorry Lil’ Wayne and Young Jeezy did not create Bape… and it was not created post-2000…
“Strictly Vintage”
Yes all of you that live and breathe “vintage.” It’s kind of amusing that all you vintage motherfuckers are rocking kicks/clothing/garments/hats/socks that came out most likely before you even hit puberty… I understand some of the shoes might look good, well… some may even actually be beautiful but it’s sure as hell unnecessary to go around jumping up and down saying “Oh I only rock vintage shit blah blah… if it didn’t come out before 1973 I don’t want it ladda laddi.” Understand there is going to be a point in time where the shit that you’re too “strictly vintage” to rock now, is going to be “vintage” one day…
“Only limited/heat none of that GR shit (OG only, fuck Retros)”
This concurs with “I buy what I like” and “Strictly Vintage” morons… Oh sorry you can’t be caught alive with some retros or anything that produced more than 150 pairs… Are we all forgetting the roots of the “game?” Because I am pretttty…. sure that back in 85’ Jordan I was general release… if I am not mistaken… Same thing with the II, III, IV, V, hey guess what even the XI, and so on…
“Beyonce”
has gone done it and fucked it up for niggas again, making all these damn biblical feministic anthems... It all started from Destiny’s Child and now as a solo artist she just keeps banging out the hits... literally. It’s like she doesn’t even have a man... is Jay not doing enough? Preaching all over the place and you know all these god damn girls are gonna listen and start quoting... "To the left, to the left" can't give a nigga any credit these days? I'm pretty sure Hov got more than just a box... ugh sick of these songs... this is why girls be getting all mad when they get dropped... flipping out thinking they can get another man in a minute... and when they find out its not that easy, going back isn’t that easy either... don’t get me wrong girls can get a man in a minute... but that’s just because a man can’t deny the booty... ask him to bring you home to his mother, until then.....
“Bitches”
I personally don't like to use the term or direct it towards anyone but I seriously don't blame the people who do now... Not saying all girls are bitches but there sure are a hellahandful of yall out there lol... Funny thing is I don't think I will EVER learn... its like a fucken disease that I got stuck with em hoodrats and bitches...
What happened to just a normal girl? do they still make those? or are they just on the verge of extinction... and the ones that are left are taken by some bunk ass niggas... lol
“Bunk Ass Niggas”
STOP TRYING…
Any girl will tell you... her 3 main features that she is looking in a man... and in this exact decending order are:
1.Personality
2.Humor
3.Looks
I don't know who’s more full of bullshit... girls that say that... or guys who believe the girls.
Guys need to start realizing that just because you think the first thing a girl says she looks for in a guy is personality doesn’t mean your ass should try to smooth talk the chick or even spit game if your ugly... because there is definitely no way that chick is going to even know what type of personality you have if you look like a bummy ass nigga, she is not going to have you the time or day and by continuing to attempt to "holla/bag" yall are fucking it as much as Beyonce these days...
If you really calculate that shit I say a decent or at least above average woman gets "hollered, honked, whistled, or hissed" at, at least 6 times on a normal day that she’s in public... Depending on her transportation/outfit etc it may vary just a bit... but on a weekend or "girls’ night out" day, it practically doubles and I can guaranDAMNtee it’s around 12-15... any above average woman will tell you this... if you say that this is not true and guys only attempt fewer than what I have stated than you surely are not above average... (Truth hurts)
anywho... so with that said by the time a real nigga can take a swing, this chick is fed up, and basically isn’t having it. Thanks to all yall bunk ass niggas, keep up the good mother fucken work...
“Girls that just want to be friends”
To this day I don't get this one bit... unless I met you through work, school, or another friend, the word should never be brought up in any of our conversations unless its like "Oh do you want me to bring my friend?" Females need to understand that every man is thinking the exact same thing when he approaches you, "I'm going to fuck that bitch," period... There is no "Oh she would be a great person to take to the movies/dinner and waste money on in return for her indulging conversations and thoughts." So please if you have two beasts and you are reading this just say "No" because men these days don't need any more friends, we got enough... I understand that for some odd reason females these days want a "male" friend to talk to because there is supposively somethings that they can't discuss with their boyfriends because its about them... or even their best(girl)friend because it might be about them too lol... and if this is the case, the male friend will never complete his main goal.. because by the time you realized your current man is a piece of shit and decide to move on something worth it, you guys are too good of friends, "You're like my brother, I don't want to mess up our friendship" Aww... Fuck You...
“Girls that are friends but want a relationship”
Now with the above said... for the lucky few that do become our "friends" either from work, school. friend of a friend etc... Don't fuck it up... lol bitches these days always gotta fuck up everything... Don't get me wrong fellas have the universal law "Niggas over Bitches" but with very few exceptions, sometimes I would take certain bitches over a few niggas anyday just for the mere fact that they are just more chill and "cooler?/real" lol but when a bitch crosses that lines... once again don't get me wrong all guys want to do these days is fuck or get sucked... so I am pretty sure any man wouldn't mind to do that to a stranger or a friend lol... but the bitches that want more than a friendship... basically a relationship just gone fucked it up... because as males and a friend we really can't say "No..." because if a friend just found out that she was rejected by a close friend the friendship wouldn't be the same EVER... shes not going to look at you as that nice good friend but the nigga that rejected her... but if we say "Yes" its a lose/lose literally... because guess what? the majority of relationships dont last, look at the divorce rate lol and thats when people are obligated by law to stay together... It's just inevitable... So with that said its just statistically not likely to last, so in the end we gotta find a NEW best (girl) friend and a girlfriend... The infamous "Lose/Lose"
“The ‘Let me call you back,’ bitches”
These bitches never seize to amaze me. I am a grown ass man and do not need to be lied to or given the run-around. If you say your going to call back in 30 minutes, I expect it to be within 29 minutes. If you say your going to call me back, proper phone etiquette clearly states to call that person back before the day is over (by 11:59 PM of the same day) not a minute after. I understand if something comes up and you are unavailable to converse for more than 5 minutes but its just common courtesy to call that person and tell them that you will have to postpone or rain-check it because your busy. It doesn’t matter how fucken busy you are, especially with technology these days you can clearly flip your cell phone open go to recent calls and press talk then say “I’ll have to call you tomorrow (or another time) because I am a bit busy at the moment sorry.” was that fucken hard? Shit I know people that do that while delivering babies.
Ignoring calls is also never a good look either... especially when you get the call and you look at all your stank cockblocking bitches and say “Oh my its this nigga again why won’t he stop calling?” Well if you told that nigga that you didn’t want to talk to him ever again I am pretty sure he would get the picture instead of just giving him the run around... I think the main fucken reason why I am so amazed at the females actions in these situations is because why would you give your fucken number in the first place? Shit... I am pretty sure all of us learned how to say “No” as a child and I am pretty sure it’s not that difficult, don’t get me wrong I understand there are some persistent dickheads that just can’t take “No” for an answer, but shit the majority of us will understand especially if say “Sorry, I have a boyfriend” even if it’s a lie, because that is always better than the hardcore rejection of “Nigga you ain’t good enough for me” line...
“E-Testosterone”
I’ll try to make this short because I can literally type a book on this shit... Motherfuckers... yes you motherfuckers... Telling every girl she’s “Cute, Sexy, and Beautiful” is not going to get you closer to pussy, so why bother?(with the exception of dirty whores) If anyone can explain this phenomenon to me with somewhat of a practical perspective I would love to hear it... These motherfuckers are worse than the “Bunk ass Niggas,” because yall fuck up the game before the clock even starts... You guys are the motherfuckers that gas these bitches before they even walk out the damn door. Making bitches think they’re god’s gift when they have “1000+ ‘friends’ and endless compliments.”
Don’t get me wrong its not completely the male’s fault because last time I checked the trait that all females dislike the most are “Liars,” any bitch will tell you that she hates liars/fake people... If that isn’t #1 on the “No, No list” it’s at least top 3. Guess what girls... all these guys are lying to you... especafuckenly when they call you “Beautiful,” because every true male knows that the “B” word is the most cherished, treasured, and sacred adjective to describe any female. Beautiful is that type of female you plant the seed on the first night, bring home to your mother, and undoubtably know that this is the one. Sorry to tell the females but less than 10% of the female race is beautiful... and less than 3% possess true physical and mental beauty. So here’s an example if you girls are out with your friends, to make it easy lets say 10 in total... If a real man comes up to one of you and says you are “beautiful” then the 9 others are not, statisically speaking... now you ask, well what happens if he says 3 out of 10 are “beauitful?” Then he’s a mother fucken liar... period... Don’t get me wrong this doesn’t mean that you are “Decent, Straight, Above Average, Pretty, Cute, Sexy, or Gorgeous,” your just not “Beautiful...”
“Clubs and Parties”
I would be a hypercrit if I said I never participated in this pointless pastime. But in the wise words of another “What’s the point of going to a club to grind on a niggas dick and never talk to him again.” Shit you could just stay home, dim the lights, and turn on music and dance with your girls for free... Another pointless pleasure upon the female community. Because you know damn straight you’re not going to give that nigga your number and even if you wanted, the other 9 cockblocking friends are going to stop that shit from happening... so with that said... Fuck.....
“CockBlockers”
Yes you know who you are... no need to point. The infamous “Cockblocker” majority known as females but don’t get it twisted guys are as reckless as the girls. To tell you the truth men are the reckless cockblockers and women are more of the smart/organized professionals.
There are a few levels of your cockblocking ranging from spontaneous to premediated:
‘The Stranger’
The most common of the cockblockers, the one that just gives the “look,” yes the “look...” The look that basically means “Eww Nigga/Bitch” or “Are you serious?” These cockblockers are not the most harmful ones because when you get the target out of range it should be easy from then.
‘The Jealous’
Sometimes a stranger but for the majority she/he is part of your clique... These are the people of the group that like but are not liked... For example, if a male was to approach a group of females and the target was “A.” “A” would deny the offer because “B” of the group likes you, so out of friendship the male as to either settle for “B” or get nothing at all because “A” will not disrespect “B.”
‘The Greedy’
Again this could be a complete stranger or even part of your clique and for the most part these are majority males, because females for the most part are satisfy with 1. This is the nigga that just thinks he’s better than everyone and deserves more and all. He is the one that if it’s a group of males targeting a group of females he will get first pick, and if he doesn’t all cockblocking breaks loose. Depending on his level of cockblocking he will try his best not to allow you to wrap it up or even attempt. His golden rule is basically “If he can’t have her, noone can, period...”
‘The We came as a group we leave as a group’
Unquestionably all of these are females. Basically you ain’t getting shit tonight if she came with a group of her friends... because they came together and sure as hell leaving together... and if you try to fight the power it is not a lovely sight after that. This bitch will do everything in her power to make sure that everyone is accounted for at the end of the night. Even resort to law authority if necessary. These are the vicious, determined, and persistent of all... Beware.
‘The Experienced’
Again females dominate this category. These lovely creatures have been in the target’s shoes before and have learned from her mistakes. She is that type of zipper that has a question and an answer for everything.
‘The Reckless’
These are most likely acquaintances, they know of you or the target. Isn’t someone that you would go to for advice, but you see them as a somewhat sanicle person and question “Why would they lie?” These ones are the ones that shout and whisper... most of the time just straight lies and will communicate with either you or the target, it doesn’t matter. Examples are stating false “habits, STD, previous relations, or current”ie. “Don’t fuck with that bitch she got herpes” or “Chris, did you fuck that bitch you bagged the other day?” Yes it’s a shame but this is hand and hand for both males and females...
‘***The Professional***’
The most vicious of them all. These ones have studied the art of cockblocking for years, some even decades. Possess a perfect cockblocking success rate. They are so good that all actions are no longer premeditated but unconsciously done. The ones that are seldom and calm with their blocking. The ones that block before the target is even in sight or range. These ones will tell you before you even fathom the thought that “You’re not good enough for her/him.” The “Don’t even bother” because before you could even attempt they have told the target anything and everything and basically given the heads up that this is a “NO, NO!” Once a rare breed, but now it seems like they’re training the rest to follow in their footsteps. These ones possess the 7th sense of sensing partial threats yards sometimes miles before it occurs and redirects the target/group. And undoubtably the most harmful skill of these Master Cockblockers is the fact that for the most part their teachings/advice is true.
Update... These were written A LONG time ago... back in Feburary or something just didn't feel like updating... a bit half ass but none the less Fuck these too...
“Filispics”
You are asian, point blank... last time I checked there as no continent called “Pacific Island.” and just because your ancestors got knocked up and bitched by the Spaniards back in the day that does that mean you can go around thinking you’re Latin or Hispanic because at the end of the day you’re ASIAN!
“People who ask for comments”
This is as bad as asking for fucken votes... shut the fuck up for once... this goes both for SneakerPlay and MySpace... if you deserve a comment you will get it... no need to fucken make bulletins or go around commenting other peoples pages with the same bullshit “New Pictures... Comment!!! who the fuck cares... apparently there is a reason your comment count is low because no one fucken likes you, face it.
“Fakes (sneakers, people who wear them, and people who comment on them)”
Yes Fuck Fakes and fuck the people who rock em. BUT*** FUCK THE PEOPLE WHO COMMENT ON THEM EVEN MORE! Ya’ll act like you’ve never seen a fucken pair of fakes in your god damn life and this is like the most astonishing thing since sliced bread. Don’t get me wrong I do not support fakes in any way, shape, or form but shit I understand not all of us can drop a buck and some change on kicks every other week... So I don’t knock the kids that want a pair of variants because they can’t afford the real thing. But again there are those types that be rocking fucken ridiculous colorways like they’re on some colorblind shit... and those who fucken have a WHOLE COLLECTION!... once again I don’t support fakes but can understand if you have a pair or two due to your financial state but shit if you got more than 2 pairs, (ex 13 pairs) shit you could of saved up your damn money and got 2 real pairs with that shit... Lets use common sense people...
Now back to those who just can’t get enough of commenting on the obvious and love to blow shit up that is not necessary... It’s one thing to blow someone up when they’re talking shit and everything but there is another thing when someone is just minding their own business living their own life... Some of you need to do the same fucken thing... Stop stressing over the obvious... In the past year alone with the Sneaker Boom in its prime I have come across countless fakes in person and just kept it to myself because what do I really benefit from saying “Oh look at his fakes blah blah blah” ABSOLFUCKENLUTELY NOTHING! And this goes same for shit on the internet... If I had a dollar for every fake I saw on the internet, shit I’d be up there with Bill Gates... but its just a waste of time to even acknowledge them... and some of you might have seen me comment of a fake recently.. Well not exactly comment but I went to this person’s page which he clearly had fakes and just left... didn’t bother leaving comments or messages.... then he wants to come at me and leave me a comment “Weak” not sure what he was referring to but I just gave his link to some and fed the fire... but for the most part its unfuckennecessary to see 100+ comments about an obvious fakes... Do you people get orgasms dissing on fakes or something? Shit let it be... Because by you comment on the fakes:
A. Its not going to stop them from rocking it, they are clearly rocking it for a reason, if they aren’t financial stable, cant get their hands on the real thing, or just like the colorways whatever it is the likely hood of you stopping fakes is the same as stopping creases...
B. Shit is not going to put money in your pocket so why bother? You’re wasting your breath and time.
So please just SHUT THE FUCK UP... WE KNOW, WE KNOW, ITS FAKE WHIPPITY DOO...
“Children that can’t dress themselves”
Yes children... all you motherfuckers that post up pointless threads on how to match and coordinate are fucken children... ASK YOUR MOTHER... lately there have been a numerous amount of threads/post/comments on how to fucken match... I personally have yet to see a female create a thread over it, it must be because males are the only ones that are colorblind, because there’s absolutely no excuse for not knowing how to match... and as Bobbito would say “Burgundy is not red.” How hard is it to match fucken colors? Seriously... its fucken colors!!! I feel like they need to make a book “How to Dress for Dummies” Written By: Your Mother... but again I can understand because there are some morons out there... so with that said...
“People who mismatch purposely...”
What the fuck... are you mother fucken colorblind? I can understand you don’t have anything to wear but shit throw on a white tee and you’d be good... and then again I can understand you are just bumming it or mowing the fucken lawn or something but shit I see all these niggas going out to partys/clubs/public trying to look fresh with orange tees on and green kicks.... shit if you can’t find the right colors/shades to match don’t rock em until you do... in the great words of DJ Clark Kent “If I can’t find an outfit I will make an outfit, shit I will iron on a picture of the sneakers to a tee and rock it” and this is not just for the niggas... because bitches... ugh yall be looking like a HOT MESS sometimes... thinking your cute because you got some neon green kicks and a hot pink shirt on... wtf is that? All NEONS DO NOT MATCH... PERIOD!... so stop. Once again with that said this ties in with..........
“Fresh Prince Wannabes”
It’s motherfucken 2007... There is a reason why Fresh Prince isn’t on the air anymore... and there are re-runs late at night... Don’t get me wrong, the “Fresh Prince” style is classic... but does not need to be resurrected. Especially for the children that are 14-21, motherfucker you didn’t even know what style was when you were watching Fresh Prince... actually I wouldn’t be surprised if your mother was still dressing you...
“Al Sharpton”
Who fucken died and made him spokesman of all and everything black? This hypercritical motherfucker seems to pop up when any type of racism, prejudice, and/or discrimination against blacks occurs... shit I am surprised this mofo don’t blow up Jelly Beans for making black ones... Point is... FUCK YOU, YOU NAPPY HEADED HOE!
***************EDIT: 08.15.07***************
INTERMISSION...
I've always been asked what is your "type?" or what do you "prefer?" but lately the question has been popping up a bit more, it could be because I'm currently accepting application/candiates, and every woman wants to know if they "fit" your preference. I myself believe and have always given an equal opportunity when it comes to a significant other. Also if you just zone out to those specific preferences than its possible that you just cut yourself off from at least 80% of the population. I would be lying if I said not everyone had a specific "type" but then again some aren't physically nor mentally gifted?, to be picky.
So with that said I'm going to try to answer this mind dwelling question that females somehow think is a bit important when it comes to finding their "Mr. Right."
I must warn anyone who reads this, that it may offend some or even most but this is written on a WifeyID basis, meaning if they had an ID boutique at 255 Elizabeth in a secret passage behind the af1 wall and I was forced to create my "perfect solemate" then it would go a little something like this:
[Also I am going to try to write this in "Will Smith" language since I've noticed that my tongue has been a bit loose in previous entries and I understand there are a few youngns out there that when it comes to vulgar language it is like a cardinal sin or something.]
***EDIT: I thought I could Will Smith this all and well that's not going to be possible so the first part will be Smithing and the second part will be simplier and more comprehendable terms.... enjoy
Moving on...
"The Perfect Solemate..."
Does NOT necessarily walk on rubber platforms with little swooshes branded on the bottom EVERYDAY. Nor six inch sticks while attending a paintball shootout, But rather has a diverse selection for every occasion. (this basically means stop wearing fucken shit like you got no damn sense... if you going on a hike are you going to wear heals and a skirt? and if you're going to a family gathering ie. dinner, you're not going to be wearing flipflops and sweats please act like you are somewhat aware of you're plans and the evironment, instead of all these bitches who spend 2 hours trying to look cute going to walmart... and the bitches that don't give two fucks for anyone... have some respect, selfish ignorant ass bitches...)
Is beautiful without make-up but just applies enough to blend in with the "others" (no makeup period is real beauty. this means no fucken eye shadow/liner, powder, toner whatever the fucken rest are... whatever you come out of the shower looking like is natural (hopefully you wash your face) the only thing I could really understand is chapstick, lip balm, or maybe lip gloss... I'm sick of looking at all these pasty faced bitches that be acting like they're 11 and just got they're first make up kit. and I definitely don't need to be waking up next to a different face that I went to sleep with.)
Is one that makes you want to stay up all night like an insomniac just so you don't miss a frame of her beauty but makes you want to wake up early to see the heartmelting sight of the sunrise over her beauty. (bitch gotta have something about her that makes you wonder (and I'm not talking about which stds she got or how many...) type of bitch that makes you act like a little kid that doesn't want to leave... or wakes up earlier than the sun to open christmas presents. type of bitch just the sight of her you could never get bored because if the slightest urge of boredom comes around all you gotta think is I finally find the one)
Has the right curves which are porportionate to her body, not ridiculous neither. the 1.5 : 2 ratio (simply... porportionate meaning... I don't need a buffythebody booty, but don't get me wrong I wouldn't mind it haha.. and I don't need these double ds but then again I don't want to have to throw some ds on you either. maybe simplier said cocacola redbone...)
Coated with: NOT dark chocolate, not mocha, not french vanilla, nor hazelnut or creme. a caramel complexion from head to toe and all in between. (tone nothing is sexier than the perfect tone... not saying tone is everything but shit, tone gives an individual a feeling of life. caramel complexion... period don't come at me with you're pasty ass vanilla or crusty ashy burnt dark chocolate. tone is definitely not that serious but if I had to choose it would be that mmm mmm goood caramel... I don't need those pale-ass bitches that be looking sick like they ever seen the damn sun, nor do I need a bitch that got that tanning salon spray on orange tan either... and definitely don't need a bitch that looks like she lives on the beach... like wakes up to sun and sleeps when it sets... bitches these days in the summer be thinking the beach is the new club scene... that shit definitely aint cute... get a job... spend the majority of you're week making money and building foundation for your future not baking away trying to get skin cancer...)
Skinned with the texture that would make newborns jealous. (lately I've been realizing that bitches got some softass skin haha... I guess its the benefits of having a vagina and two breast... so this isn't that hard it should be standard... but don't mark my words there are a handful of bitches out there with some crusty ashy ass texture, like they got into a big argument with jergens and vasoline and haven't made up type crusty.... lotion is maybe one of the cheapest applications to improve/correct shit... and if you know you got those deep natural hardworkinghatian ash don't fucken use that expensive weakass scented shit.. go to your nearest bodega or convience store and get that thick industrial, guarenteed to smooth out elephant skin shit...)
Draped with strands straight enough to run your fingers through as if a waterfall but wavy and curly enough to get wrapped in like a whirlpool. With a candy apple tone that is hidden in shadows but radiates in light. (this is rare for most, but a bitch who got [immigrantgrandmothers] "Tha gud herr" [/immigrantgrandmothers] NATURALLY straight hair but not straight perm chank shit.. straight with a tad of waves not those "peterrican" waves going on to curls. Thin but thick at the same time and flipped at the ends... hair that is tangible and compliments any style. color is essential too.... don't need that deep dark black looking like every asian and their mothers, sisters, auntie, and cousin... and definitely don't need anything that you got the color from a Crayola box... but a natural dark dark dark almost black, brownish red that looks black inside but when out on the beach or any sun exposure shines a vivid red blended in brown.)
Tongue twists and turns enoughs to be kept on your toes every time air vibrates up her throat but is settled and calm enough to also respect her. (for all you nasty minds don't worry you're not alone BUT one of the few things that can balance off some flaws is the voice of a bitch with multilingual lingo... I'm not talking about you're hoochie hoodrat or ghetto spicilicious spanish... talking about that broken up bumboclot ju fucken pussyhole gall "I've bin hea tree yars" west indies accent... (lol jk even though that is mmmm sexy) a bitch who can be fluent in some other language than english, chank, and spanish.. could be because well I'm pretty fluent in english and well chanks are just chanks... and definitely can't stand that spanish shit anymore, could be because I live in nyc and all you hear is spics screaming at eachother... bitch needs to know how to keep her tone at a respectful conversational level in certain situations... shit in all situations I don't want to hear a bitch raise her voice unless she's in danger, trying to call me over, or mad because I did something wrong(which would be never =P) but so we don't stray too far off topic something calm and settling... this doesn't mean you don't speak english... that of course is a must...)
Is puckered with lucious irresistable soup coolers =P that make you want to leave yours crusty and hide the lip balms just so she could manually remoist and rejuvenate yours... (I recently learned that all lips are not for me... thought I go from big thick nigga lips to thin slim cracker lips but I guess not... I can handle the average to big but those small thin ones are a big no no... its like my nigga lips literally suck their face... so with that said those lucious soft puffy but medium lips are mmmm delicious and could keep me satisified for a while... not sayings are everything because shit if you don't know how to use them (which is surprising 65% of all bitches I've ever been with...) then I guess there's no point right? like I don't mind those DSLs =) but certainly don't need it... as long as you can keep up with mines without tapping out you should be good...)
Nicotine virgin... (Simply said, definitely not simply found... finding bitches these days that don't smoke (cigarettes, weed, crack) is harder than fucken finding virgins... you would think, especially with my generation that they would know better right? all the negative sideeffects and symptoms would open eyes and close mouths? all the warning and teaching from edlers, teachers, and telovision growing up from toddler days... all the people that die.... what is it going to take to change this epidemic? this is one of the most unattractive habits period. sucking on a cancer stick is worse than a bitch sucking off every dick in sight. (ok maybe not worse but sureasdamn close...)
the perfect woman just doesn't hear BUT listens... comprehends, analyzes, and gives feedback.
carries herself with a humble confidence (I don't think bitches realize how attractive or unattractive this can be... a bitches confidence can make or break her...
earns respect by giving respect while respecting herself
understands the value of a dollar and analyzes situations and level of "need" compared to "want" before making purchases.
recognizes what she has and realizes that a relationship is a blessing and priveledge and not a right and necessity.
Can independantly support herself and another if necessary.
doesn't need to be told, suggested, or recommeded anything. she realizes the problem or situaton and brings it your attention and not leaving it for more controversy to pile on top of it.
deals and mediates problems as they occur or even before they occur but does not let them go untoched for more to pile up.
never has to be given choices but makes her own choice and chooses wisely, while considering that this is not a perfect world and you don't always get what you want and at times you might have to sacifice one for another.
Too bad no one is perfect... and the "Perfect Solemate can only be found in a perfect world... and we all know that this world is far from perfect... and with that said if you guys/gals are wondering about the passage? above the "Perfect Solemate isn't perfect either... That is the result of months of sidekicking on the train while commuting to work... and most of the time I was just jamming to music or sleeping... and the times I wasn't I went blank... so as you can see its not fully complete and as you get to the end shit is just... well there... I wanted to keep it in its raw form and maybe one day when I have more time and actually thinking straight enough... I will complete it... but until then...
Back to your regular scheduled "Fuck The Following"
"People with fucken signatures"
Enough already!!!!! Please save us the space and bandwidth with that bullshit... No one cares who the fuck you are at the end and how fabolous you can jazz your name up... shit we aint pen pals and you're definatly not writing a letter so what the fuck is up with the signature! we clearly know who the fuck you are with the little default icon and not to mention your fucken name/tag right next to it... is it really fucken necessary? (think about this one you copy+paste bitches)
"Non-prescription contacts and glasses"
When the fuck did it become cool to fucken rock something that isn't necessary? for all you 20/20 visionarymotherfuckers yall need to fucken stop and think about
"People who cuff their pants more than an inch and a half"
this is mostly bitches but I've seen a few niggas fall into this to... stop fucken cuffing your pants more than an inch and a half... that shit is not cute or attractive and never will be.... you look like a fool... period.. if the pants are too long don't buy them or fucken get them tailored smh at people who pay hundreds for jeans and won't pay fucken $10 to get them tailored... this is as worse or eve worse than double/triple cuffing them... we are no longer in elementary school with your siblings hand me downs... and some fucken do it to show off their "exclusive/limited/fresh" kicks.. get over it.... there's most likely another bitch rocking the same pair but looks 10x better just for the fact that she doesn't have to cuff her jeans 4 inches to show them off... people with a real sense of style/fashion don't need to fucke see the whole shoe for them to know... shit some people can even tell just by the sole... but if its that serious that you need to show off your latest pick up wear fucken capris or shorts because you look like a herb.
"Bitches thinking omission isn't lying..."
FUCK THAT! Omission IS LYING. no arguement, debate, or discussion... if you purposely leave some part/info out then you're fucken lying... don't pull that bullshit "Well you didn't ask me if I was sucking Ray Ray's dick, you asked me where was I at?, what I was doing? and who I was with? and I told you I was at Shantae's house party with my girls; Shaniqua, NiNe, and Jamella dancing and just drinking a bit... which I was..." these bitches deserved to get burned at stake... some bitches even got the nerve to say "Well, I didn't tell you because I thought you'd be madd..." well how the fuck do you think I feel now that everybody else had to inform me if your lying punkass rather than you? fucken furious I tell you, fucken furious.... its one thing to tell someone before the act/fact and another to even tell them after... but to have someone find out from someone else than you... this is exactly why I don't blame some niggas for leaving bitches on the side of the road nowadays....
"Drugs and Drunk"
Being on drugs or drunk is not an excuse for your actions. if you are high or drunk and you decide to let jump on tables and strip or play with yourself or even let a few niggas run the "nyc 7 train" on you it isn't not a valid excuse to blame it on the narcotics or liquid... you're punkass should of had self control and be aware of your limits... (having someone drug your drink is a whole nother story) but don't come at me with a "oh I couldn't help it I had 10 too many drinks or everyone kept passing it my way" there were countless events/social gatherings where everybody and their mother (literally) were either drink or on drugs and all I had to say was "No, thank you....." so with that said.....
"People who can't/don't/won't say 'No'"
this is maybe one of the first and easiest lesson we learn in life, saying "No," its a one syllabal, two letter word/phrase, same in english and spanish, not fucken advance placement college trigonometry II... just say fucken "No" shit you could even say "Fucken No..." you have an opionon and right for a reason, no one is putting a gun to your forehead or a knife near your throat (but in those cases its understandable not to say "no") but anything other than that you should say fucken "no." stop with these bullshit "maybes, I don't knows. or I'm not sures." you live in a fucken yes or no world and nothing in between... some say "Well I didn't/don't want to hurt anyones feeling or make some anyone feel bad..." there a fucken bad feelings/emotions for a reason... its like most of the time its not even you don't know or you're not sure its just you don't want to say "no...." which wastes the other persons time... love it when bitches stunt at the last fucken moment with some bullshit excuse... I would think bitches would be smart in this field of lying but I guess not... if you know you're going to end up saying "no" or cancelling at the end then just say it at the beginning and it saves you the bullshit call and excuse at the end. but what's even worse since some people don't count on those maybes and make other plans, bitches want to start getting pissyfit on how you didn't make your schedule compliment theirs... this is one downside about most bitches, they can never make up their god damn mind... so with that said........
"Talk"
as cliche as this sounds "Talk is cheap..." sick of fucken bitches and niggas, hell fucken people in general that make plans/promises anything and not go through with it or keep it... for the majority of us are here because of sneakers... and well I'm pretty sure the majority of the majority also follow Nike which has a short and simple motto "Just Do It..." STOP FUCKEN TALKING, AND JUST DO IT...
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